The Rosie and Roula Show

215: Why Body Hair Still Makes Women Uncomfortable (And Who Told Us It Should)

• Roula Abou Haidar and Rosie Burrows

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This episode gets right into the messy, honest truth about body hair. Why some women shave everything daily, why others have stopped caring, and how culture quietly taught us that hairless equals clean, attractive and “normal.” Roula shares the rituals she grew up with, the pressure to be hairless, and why she feels uncomfortable even going two days without shaving. Rosie talks about sensitive skin, convenience, and why shaving every day would absolutely ruin her life.

We dig into the cultural, generational and emotional layers behind shaving, the double standards between men and women, the link between body hair and “hygiene,” and why so many women are suddenly choosing not to shave at all. There’s humour, a few uncomfortable truths, and plenty of moments that make you realise just how conditioned we all are.

What’s your honest take on body hair: do you care, or are you over it?


Topics covered

  • Why women feel pressure to shave dail
  • Where our body hair beliefs actually come from
  • Hygiene myths and cultural conditioning
  • Why men’s body hair is accepted but women’s isn’t
  • How social media changed body hair expectations
  • Feeling “dirty” vs feeling comfortable
  • Shaving, shame and the need to be seen as attractive


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32: To Shave or Not to Shave? That’s the Hairy Question

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Roula (00:00)
All right, all right. So, ⁓ I shower every day. And this is an extremely intimate information I'm sharing with the listeners. And I shave. I shave my legs. I shave everything. My arms, my armpits. I shave everything. I don't want to see a hair on my body.

Rosie (00:03)
Mm-hmm.

All right, yep.

Wow.

Roula (00:22)
And you said to me there are more and more women who don't want to shave. And that's an extreme difference from what I am and what you're saying. Can you tell me more about it?

Rosie (00:33)
Yeah.

Well, I see.

mainly online actually, less in person, but that's probably just because I don't go out much, more women choosing not to shave their underarms or not to shave their legs or not be obsessed about a little bit of hair showing, like not having to shave every day, like you know what, that's really inconvenient, I'm not gonna do that.

I'm gonna be fricking berated in the comments, aren't I? I remember seeing, you know, the first few times you see women with long underarm hair, it's kind of like, whoa, you do a double take because I've been brought up that you shave your underarms. That's what women do. It's like, well, actually, why? Why is that something we have to do? I don't think it's right or wrong either way.

I don't know, do you? Like why do you shave every day? get, you you don't want any hair anywhere.

Roula (01:46)
⁓

yes okay two things first thing growing up it was normal that when a girl have her period she get waxed everywhere it's like a gift for having her period now she's a woman and full body wax

Rosie (02:01)
Okay. Really? Like a full body wax?

Wow.

Roula (02:09)
and I did that it hurt like hell and I said I'm not going to do this ever again but what am I gonna do with all the hair it's not that I cannot have a leg my hair should not be my legs should not be hairy my armpit should not be hairy because no one would want to date me

Rosie (02:10)
Wow! Yeah. Yeah.

Mmm.

Roula (02:35)
And I honestly don't know what opinion of men on this topic because it's never been a conversation. I understood that I have to be hairless to be attractive, but not one man ever noticed or talked about the topic or and I'm saying men because I'm in a hetero ⁓ relationship. So when I see women with their hair armpit, the first thing that crossed my mind

Rosie (02:43)
Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Mm.

Roula (03:05)
Does it stink? Sweat stink? That's the thing that crosses my mind. And at the same time, I feel like, wow, this is so like, badass.

Rosie (03:07)
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Isn't that funny? Yeah.

Yeah, it feels brave, doesn't it? Because it goes so against the norm.

Roula (03:23)
I don't like it.

Rosie (03:25)
Yeah. Okay, what don't you like about it?

Roula (03:28)
It just look... Okay, listeners, you will not believe the example that I'm gonna give, because probably it's not known to everyone. When I look at women with their head on their armpit, I think... Have you ever heard of Rasputin?

Rosie (03:34)
⁓ okay.

Yeah, but don't know what is it. Yeah.

Roula (03:45)
This is the Russian

priest that brainwashed the Empress's mind. I don't know why I Rasputin there.

Rosie (03:51)
yeah, yeah, yeah.

Roula (04:00)
Because all the images I see from Rasputin, he has like a long, very thin hair beard. And probably this is

Rosie (04:06)
God, so you see women

with hairy armpits and that's what you think. What about when you see men's hairy armpits? Do you think the same? Or is it just for women?

Roula (04:11)
Yeah, I think it looks like rasputin.

No, I think to a certain length they need to be cut.

Rosie (04:22)
trimmed.

Roula (04:23)
Because

too long and then they're like sweaty at the edges and then curly. Yeah. Okay. I have to say I don't like hair. And do know why I can confirm that? What attracted me and my husband is that he doesn't have hair on his chest. That was for me like, that's so freaking hot.

Rosie (04:36)
boy.

Wow, yeah Sexy

Wow You know what? I like the feel of not having hair on my body, but fucking hell Roula I am NOT shaving every day. I cannot be bothered Like that takes so much time. My hair grows so quickly My skin is so sensitive if I did that I would just be covered in razor rash in all sorts of things to me

That is not worth it. But here is an inconvenience.

Roula (05:12)
What is the color of

your hair?

Is it blonde? Okay. Mine is black. So if I if I would have like black hair all over my my arm, and that will be like, ⁓ don't they fall in the cooking? And and even even

Rosie (05:17)
I wouldn't say it's blonde, it's fair, it's fair. I guess same colour as my hair? Yeah. Yeah.

my god.

Do

you think it's an insecurity for you? Or is this something that you're proud of?

Roula (05:43)
I learned it's hygiene thing

Rosie (05:48)
from who?

Roula (05:49)
from my culture and my parents. So I find it really disgusting if someone have a lot of hair on their arm they're cooking, if they're not wearing like special gloves or long sleeves. I think even chefs, they wear long sleeves because they have hairy arms and they put on their head. So all the hair, I don't want to see it in the food. I did learn that actually pubic hair is necessary to protect

Rosie (05:52)
Okay, yeah.

Mm.

Roula (06:18)
our vulva and vagina from germs. So shaving pubic hair. Yeah, I can't remember what we talked about exactly. ⁓

Rosie (06:22)
We had a whole episode on that, right? So do you embrace that now?

NUMB

No. Okay. Every now and then it's an exploration. Maybe. Yeah. Yeah. You know, I think it's... I was very self-conscious as a teenager of my body hair, of the hair on my arms. You know, my leg hair would just grow so quickly. Like, and I just felt like I was the only one who had this problem.

Roula (06:36)
now and then every now and then in winter not in summer

Rosie (07:04)
You know, people could shave once a week and you wouldn't even see their hair. I can't do that.

Roula (07:09)
You know what? This conversation is a total absolute moment for people to grab a cup of coffee and listen. Because, I mean, when you talk about these topics, you have to have a cup of coffee. And this brings me to the listeners. Why don't you go to our website, rosieandroula.com/coffee and buy us a coffee. So when you listen, you know, we're also drinking a coffee with you. That's it. OK. Without hair in it. No.

Rosie (07:22)
Give it-

Yes, but without hair in it. No hair in the coffee.

Yeah, hair.

Roula (07:40)
So do you continue eating

if you have hair in your plate?

Rosie (07:44)
Not if I'm eating out, not if I'm eating out. If I've cooked it, you know what hair ends up in there is fucking Tilly's fur. It's gross, but I will keep eating. Like I'll pull it out. There might be one or two in there because it just flies around sometimes. But if I'm eating out, I will be going up there and asking for a refund. Like I just find it disgusting.

Roula (07:46)
and your foods.

Yeah, something about hair. ⁓ disgusting. Yeah, yeah. ⁓ goodness. It's horrible. Anyway, anyway, shaving or not shaving. If women don't want to shave, it's fine. I would like to experiment it for myself if I don't shave. I mean, now it's winter. Probably a good time to do it.

Rosie (08:11)
bleh bleh, huh

Yeah, if you're doing it every day.

Like if you left it a week, would that be really hard for you? ⁓

Roula (08:34)
Yes, I will feel like I haven't had a shower for ages. Yes, but I would like to go through this experiment. Yeah, I'm going to do it.

Rosie (08:39)
He feels dirty.

Yeah, I wanna know what the

re- Yeah. Even if it's just two days, cause that's longer than you'd usually leave it, you know, and just bit by bit.

Roula (08:55)
No, no, two days I

leave it on my legs in winter for two days. I do. But I have not more than two days, like two days and the third day I can't wait to wake up and go to shower and shave everything and then that's it. They're gone.

Rosie (08:59)
Okay, so.

you

I mean, I

wish my legs were smooth all the time. I love the feeling of it. I wish I didn't care and could just embrace the hairy leg thing. It would make life so much easier. It really would. Imagine that, Roula. And can you imagine how long my legs are? It is a whole thing having to shave my legs. There's a lot of leg.

Roula (09:20)
Yeah

⁓ yeah, a lot of legs. Okay,

for our listeners on YouTube, or if not, if they can leave us a message on our website or in the comments on Spotify, I have a question. I would like our listeners, if they are female, to ask their male partner if they care about hairy legs or not. And if they are female listeners, I want to know from them, do they care about hairy legs or not?

Rosie (09:56)
Yeah. Do you shave? How often? Yeah.

Roula (09:57)
Please let us know in the comments

what's the state of acceptance on this topic. Hairy legs, hairy leg is hairy topic. Yeah.

Rosie (10:04)
This hairy topic. And now

you know everybody, Roula shaves her body every day. I do not and I will not.

Roula (10:14)
every single day. I

get out of bed half an hour earlier to make sure I'm covered. ⁓

Rosie (10:21)
Wow. You know, I know I haven't seen you in

person, but just on camera, your skin looks so smooth and healthy, and I am absolutely dumbfounded how you manage to keep it like that if you're shaving every day.

Roula (10:32)
I'm not shaving my face.

Rosie (10:35)
I'm not talking about

your face. I mean, I wasn't thinking about your face. I mean, you just showed me your arms. They look smooth and like, I see your arms sometimes.

Roula (10:41)
yeah. People say if you shave every

day, then you have more hair. But I don't think this is true.

Rosie (10:50)
No, it's a myth. It is a myth. I don't like how it feels though when you've shaved and it regrows because it's a bit spiky. That's the bad feeling. I don't like that. Yeah, it's not fun.

Roula (10:51)
Yeah.

It hurts. Like if you want

to hurt someone you rub yourself against them. And I do put baby oil after I shave. I like smear my whole... Yes, yes. So that's it. That's why I wake up so early.

Rosie (11:04)
Wrap your spiky hair again!

You have like a whole routine. Yes, okay. All right.

Let us know your hairy state of affairs in the comments. I want to read it. Thanks for this topic, Roula. Okay.

Roula (11:26)
Alright, yes, please let us know. Bye!