The Rosie and Roula Show

151: Belly Buttons, Baby Bumps & a Dad bonding with the baby in the womb

• Roula Abou Haidar and Rosie Burrows

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Can belly button raspberries actually bond you with your unborn baby? 

This week, Rosie & Roula dive into one of the most unusual listener emails ever: “How should I bond with my fiancée’s baby bump?” 

🤰 From belly button raspberries to painting bumps, we explore the funny, weird, and surprisingly tender side of pregnancy bonding.

But the conversation doesn’t stop there. We also get real about:

Why belly buttons are so peculiar (and sensitive!) 👀

How partners can gently connect with their baby before birth

The pressure on new parents to “just know” what to do (spoiler: it doesn’t come naturally)

Roula’s must-read parenting book recommendation 📖

Why every parent needs to find their own style, not follow “rules”

It’s equal parts hilarious, awkward, and heartfelt — just the way we like it.


  • Book recommendation for parents to be and parents of babies: 

The Wonder Weeks – A Stress–Free Guide to Your Baby`s Behavior

Frans Plooij en Hetty van de Rijt and Xaviera Plooij

 

Keywords (SEO): belly button pregnancy, baby bump bonding, parenting podcast, new parent advice, pregnancy connection tips, belly painting, partner bonding with baby, pregnancy humor podcast, pregnancy belly button, first-time parents support


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Rosie (00:00)
We weren't ready last week to start recording, we? So it's just like, we were just chatting and it was really nice.

Roula (00:05)
Yeah, we were catching up on our just being Rosie and Rula without the show. That was good. Yeah. And I think we can do this now, but we have to be careful to cut it and dive into our podcast.

Rosie (00:08)
life. Yeah, yeah.

Yeah

Yes, I have a couple of episodes, episode ideas. well, yeah. Did you check our email recently? Because I saw a very interesting email.

Roula (00:26)
Ideas? Amazing, amazing. Okay, shoot, let's start.

Rosie (00:39)
that I want to talk about.

Roula (00:39)
I didn't,

as you know, I was agonizing from my migraines, so I did not log into unnecessary stuff.

Rosie (00:44)
⁓ yeah.

Well, probably good you didn't because you would have got a migraine trying to read this email. So let's bring it up.

I shouldn't be so judgmental, but I can't figure out Rula if this is a genuine listener or not. I actually, it's so long. I can't read the whole email. Yes. Hold on. What?

Roula (01:16)
Okay, hold on before.

Wow!

I wanted to change the title of the recording.

I interrupted you go on

Rosie (01:27)
right. Yeah, can we get on with it now? You are, come

on, gosh. Okay, this is from Josh. And I don't quite know what my question is, but I'm gonna read a little bit of the email and then we're gonna see what we wanna talk about. He says, hello ladies, me and my partner slash girlfriend slash fiance slash soon to be wife.

Need your assistance slash advice slash help slash tips slash tricks slash tools slash ideas slash info slash guidance. Okay. You ready? ⁓ We're both in our twenties as well as from the UK. Anyway, we're both expecting our very first baby child daughter together very soon. Or at least my girlfriend is pregnant with our first baby together. We're both also hoping to have a baby boy or son later on if things go to plan with planning for our second baby together.

Anyway, we both want to know what the best ways are to engage or play with or bond mess around with her belly button, belly or baby bump during her pregnancy. Is kissing her belly, her belly button, her baby bump a good way or rubbing her belly, belly button, baby bump with my hand or cuddling her belly or talking to her belly?

or singing to her belly or making farting sounds into her belly by blowing into it loudly with my mouth, AKA belly farts, belly blows, belly raspberries, zurbots, never heard that word, all over the tummy area or poking her belly button with my finger or wiggling my finger in her belly button. Now this email goes on and on and on, and it's asking questions about the development of the baby and all these things, but

Maybe if we just focus on that first paragraph, there is a lot going on there.

Do you think this is a legitimate question?

Roula (03:21)
That's it.

Rosie (03:23)
I'm lost.

Roula (03:24)
Yeah, in the beginning, yes, definitely. But then this person went on and on with all these ideas. It sounded it's close to a fetish. You know, like it's. Yeah, that is so much want to to play with this bomb, baby bump. ⁓ I don't want to go. Yeah.

Rosie (03:36)
fetish. Well, it could be right. It could be.

Yeah, he's very, he's very interested in the bump.

Roula (03:53)
Yes, well, a bump is so beautiful, really, like to have a baby and have grown bump. It's really beautiful. And we all have different belly buttons. Some people have it inward, other have it flat, other like mine. It's a knot. It's so clear that it's a knot. And when the shape of the belly grow, the belly button

Rosie (03:58)
you

Is that? Now I want to see your belly button.

Roula (04:23)
appears. The belly button appears, it's either like go outward or gets bigger. Yeah, it's it's this physical change. And that's actually so interesting because no one talks about the belly button. A pregnant woman can wear summer address in the summer. And then you would see the belly button like sticking out from like the fabric, poking out the fabric.

Rosie (04:26)
Hmm.

Mmm.

Mm, poking out.

And when you

think of the belly button, like it is, but it's also amazing because that's where the umbilical cord attaches to us as a baby. And we're, that's where we get our nutrients from the placenta and isn't that magical. And we all look down, we got this belly button as a reminder. ⁓ yeah. Just blowing my mind a little bit.

Roula (04:53)
So bellybutton is peculiar.

Yeah, and

I would not recommend touching it. It's a very sensitive spot when a woman is pregnant. So it's better not to touch it. Yes, yes. ⁓ Yeah, indeed. Like if you're cleaning your belly button, sometimes you feel nauseous. I don't know if you experienced that. ⁓ We use this as a side note. We used to make a joke when we were little.

Rosie (05:20)
it is a bit, yeah.

even more so than usual.

Yeah, yeah.

I have. You gotta be gentle.

Roula (05:43)
Yeah, you have to be gentle. Don't play with your belly button. Your butt will fall off. It's like, you know. ⁓ Yeah, the only I don't want to talk too much about this. The one thing, Rosie, I want to say it would be so much fun to do belly painting. Like finger painting, and then he can go and paint stuff.

Rosie (05:52)
Can you imagine? Okay, well, let's approach this.

Right.

I mean,

Okay, but, but he can't just go up to his fiance and slap paint on her belly. So what is our advice for Josh? How should he approach this? Because obviously he feels her belly is very important and symbolic and all the things. So what guidance can we offer to him? Where should he start? I feel like there should be a conversation with his fiance first.

Roula (06:35)
definitely definitely the only thing he should do is two warm hands gentle warm hands on the belly to feel the baby moving or caress the belly gently that's it no crazy stuff I mean unless they are into it him and his girlfriend slash fiance slash soon-to-be wife

Rosie (06:49)
Okay, okay, hang on, hang on. Yes, let me stop you because slash fiance slash future. Yeah, exactly.

But let me stop you. You are giving advice that you would like. What if his fiance does not want her belly touched? I think they need to go back to there. Cause I can't, did he say, did he say his fiance was asking this question? I can't remember. think he was asking it.

Roula (07:12)
⁓ that's a good point.

I can't remember. Yeah.

Rosie (07:21)
It was a lot of words. no, they both want to know. They both want to know. So maybe they think it's developmentally important or something. I think they do what feels right. Why not?

Roula (07:23)
What does, yeah, he needs to know what does she wants and...

Definitely he would connect with the baby because if he speaks to the baby in her belly, the baby will hear his voice and will recognize his voice when he comes to do this in their arms. So talking to the baby is so important, both of them.

Rosie (07:41)
Mmm.

Yeah.

Kind of cool. Yeah, I don't have much else more to say, but it's really made me think about my belly button and the fact that yours looks like it's been tied in a knot. Obviously all of our belly buttons have been tied, but actually no, how do they do it? Cause they cut your umbilical cord. They do tie a knot, don't they? Or do they just clamp it? I can't remember.

Roula (07:55)
Ew.

Rosie (08:16)
What do they do? I haven't been in a birthing room. They clamp and then it like shrivels up, doesn't it? It's disgusting. ⁓ so there's not actually a knot tied.

Roula (08:17)
know they just just put a clem yeah

It falls out, it dries and falls out, I don't

remember, no, I don't remember either. Well, I wasn't very conscious when they were dealing with the belly button.

Rosie (08:30)
Mmm.

You're just given birth. Yeah.

I just remember when my sister was born, the disgusting umbilical cord, now it all shrivels and goes black and disgusting.

Roula (08:48)
You've seen that? You were in the room?

Rosie (08:50)
wasn't in the room. No, but when she came home from the hospital, it was still attached. Yeah. No, I haven't been in the birthing suite or anything like that. Anyway, have a look down at your belly button. Everybody tell us what it looks like. Rulers look like, looks like a knot has been tied in it. Mine. I don't know. Just, I don't know. I can't see where it stopped. I'm like lifting my shirt up, looking at it. Anyway, this is weird.

Roula (08:55)
⁓ yeah, yeah.

That's true.

Okay, we have to make a close-up picture.

Rosie (09:19)
my God.

Okay. Think about it. All right, everybody. This is our first episode back from holiday. ⁓ no, we did do another, we did do a welcome back episode, didn't we? Did we?

Roula (09:24)
Yes, yes.

Yeah, we did. Is there any other interesting question on the email to answer?

Rosie (09:33)
I'm so not with it. Hey, I need to get back in the groove.

⁓ you really want to bring that up? Yep. Okay. Hang on. ⁓ yes, I will try and skim read, if we could recommend any good baby or child books that they could consider buying, suggest any good toys, ⁓ playtime activities, TV shows.

Roula (09:41)
From Josh? His name is Josh?

Rosie (10:05)
Back to the belly button raspberries. Is it good for child development?

⁓ good ways of making our daughter giggle or laugh.

Roula (10:15)
Okay,

okay, that's it. I heard enough, Okay, we're not giving this parental advices. No, the belly button is such a funny story and I like to respond to it. I will respond in a personal email to Josh to give him a book that I think it's a must have for every new parent.

Rosie (10:17)
You had enough!

Stop gatekeeping. What is it? You'll reply to Josh, but what's the book? Do you remember the name?

Roula (10:41)
The book is,

it's, hold on, the book is in Dutch, I want to see what's the name of the book in English. It's translated to thousands of languages.

Rosie (10:47)
Mm-hmm.

⁓ okay.

Roula (10:57)
Just bear with me, listeners. ⁓

Rosie (11:01)
She's Googling. She's holding the phone at a distance. she hasn't, yeah, she hasn't got her glasses on. So she's holding her phone away, squinting a little bit. Here we go.

Roula (11:03)
I'm googling and I'm not wearing my glasses.

Even when I'm on Amazon.

I can't find the title in English. I find it in German. Okay, I will look it up and send.

Rosie (11:21)
Well, I guess we'll put it in the, we can

put it in the show notes as well. So people who are curious can look at this book because I want to know what it is too.

Roula (11:32)
Yes,

and this book, doesn't tell you. Oh, sorry, I'm talking over all over you.

Rosie (11:38)
No,

continue. I think there's a bit of a lag. Continue. Keep going.

Roula (11:44)
This book, it doesn't tell parents what to do and how to do it at all. Nothing. This book is about the development of the baby from the moment it comes out of the womb into our arms. Why they cry? Why sometimes they sleep, sometimes they don't sleep. Our insecurity as new parents, our fears and it's site.

Rosie (12:05)
Hmm?

Roula (12:13)
experience from parents. Why is this important? Because there is no right or wrong way. Every parent have their own style, whether it work or not. The good thing about it is when we read about different styles, it's okay to try them to see what works best for us and then reinvent our style that work for us. And this book gives so much strength for parents because really,

Rosie (12:35)
Yes! Yes!

Roula (12:42)
Becoming a new parent, it's a whole new territory and you think it comes natural? Fuck that. No, it doesn't come natural.

Rosie (12:49)
Whoa, whoa,

okay Yeah

Roula (12:54)
it's hard work

and it's the love that makes you that is coming natural but raising a baby from the moment they are born it's not natural because the woman doesn't know her body so this baby is need to to be fed nursed how okay anyway this book i recommend it for every new parents that's it

Rosie (13:10)
Roula this needs to be an episode. ⁓

Okay, well,

we will put the title in the description and I think this topic of parenting not coming naturally deserves its own episode. So we'll catch you in the next one where we're going to talk about that. Let us know your thoughts on belly buttons.

Roula (13:33)
Yes.

Rosie (13:38)
you