The Rosie and Roula Show

150: Dessert Before Dinner? Why Not!

• Roula Abou Haidar and Rosie Burrows

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This episode is all about breaking the rules—literally. We dive into the age-old question: is dessert only for after dinner, or can you enjoy it whenever you feel like it? From childhood eating habits to restaurant disappointments, we explore how sugar, tradition, and personal quirks shape our sweet-tooth choices. And spoiler: we’re officially giving you permission to eat dessert first.

Topics covered:

  • Why dessert after dinner isn’t a universal tradition
  • How childhood and cultural influences shape sweet cravings
  • When rules about food and etiquette just don’t make sense
  • Finding joy in breaking food rules—especially around sweets
  • Dessert tips: timing, portions, and when indulgence is actually guilt-free

Do you stick to dessert after dinner, or do you sneak it whenever you feel like it?

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Rosie (00:01)
Yeah, you got one?

Roula (00:04)
Something in the line. No, hold on.

I can't like word it properly. ⁓

Rosie (00:13)
having trouble finding the words. You know what? Story of my life. ⁓

Roula (00:19)
Yeah.

Not on the podcast.

Rosie (00:23)
Really? I find it so hard to articulate myself sometimes.

Roula (00:28)
my goodness, every time I hear you back, I'm like, I'm so glad you said something valuable because I'm talking and talking and talking.

Rosie (00:37)
I feel the same about you, but what's the

Short sweet one, no pun intended. Dessert before dinner. Is this acceptable?

Queen of etiquette. What say you?

Roula (01:05)
Haven't we done this one?

Rosie (01:07)
to break.

Roula (01:10)
I don't remember, I feel like the question, I heard it from you before.

Rosie (01:11)
I didn't think we did.

You wrote the question

in there, I believe, in our notes. Maybe that's why. Well, if this episode gets published, it's because RULA's wrong and we haven't done it yet.

Roula (01:19)
⁓ okay. Yeah. All right, all right. Yes, that's what.

dessert dessert

before dinner okay why not

Rosie (01:36)
Yeah, why not? I agree. Sometimes you gotta be a little bit naughty.

Roula (01:43)
I think when I eat something sweet, I crave for something hearty afterwards.

Rosie (01:49)
Very.

Roula (01:52)
Okay, I do not eat dessert. I don't.

Rosie (01:53)
That's interesting. ⁓

Okay, okay. So it's not like a typical thing for you to eat, yeah.

Roula (01:59)
Okay, I don't.

No, no, it's not. I know from my...

Rosie (02:05)
But you have it sometimes, right? Special occasion.

Roula (02:10)
⁓ do I? Maybe a dark chocolate, piece of dark chocolate. I don't eat ice cream. Cake is not a dessert, so I would rather have a piece of cake with a cup of tea.

Rosie (02:16)
Mm.

How is cake

not dessert? It's sweet!

Roula (02:28)
Yeah, probably it has to do with my upbringing. like it's not common to have dessert after dinner is fruit, a cup of coffee. It's not I don't have this tradition to have this said after dinner. And when I came to the Netherlands, it was it's a holy thing.

Rosie (02:42)
Interesting.

It's probably really weird.

Yeah, you know, growing up, we rarely had dessert. It just wasn't a thing. And then I discovered that all my friends would have dessert. And I thought, I'm missing out. But yeah, it was never a normal thing for me growing up. Like if we had dessert, that was very unusual and it was a really big treat. Very exciting.

Roula (03:16)
Nice. Even when we go to restaurant, my husband and I, we don't order dessert because we first, we don't want to eat all the sugar. And second, it feels disappointing. I don't think dessert is done properly. It's mostly bought from the bakery. Even if it's a good restaurant, I feel disappointed. But that's me again. I have very high standards when it comes to foods.

Rosie (03:37)
Yeah.

Yeah,

well this is a boring conversation. This is a boring conversation. But I like the... Okay, go on then. Yes.

Roula (03:45)
You can't judge me for this, it's okay. Okay, let me take you somewhere else. My son, my son sometimes

ask me in a very shy way and hoping I won't say no, if you can have dessert before dinner. And I'm like, go for it. If you have dessert at three in the afternoon, it's much more healthier than having it at seven in the evening. Cause you're gonna be active, let all the sugar go, whatever. Be my guest, have your dessert.

Rosie (03:58)
Mm-hmm.

this.

Yeah. ⁓

Roula (04:14)
Being in a restaurant and doing this, I mean, you're free to eat whatever you want to eat anytime you want.

Rosie (04:19)
I've never done that. It's true.

Take rulers advice, why not?

Roula (04:26)
So I'm saying screw the etiquette here.

Rosie (04:28)
Here

you are, screw the etiquette. Yeah. I love it. Yeah, let's break stuff. You know, the other morning I definitely broke etiquette. had a bowl of ice cream and tinned peaches and it was glorious. I loved it.

Roula (04:32)
Let's break stuff! No.

Ah, yes. You know, and you're working on your van, so you are burning all these calories, all the fat. Do you need the energy? It's the right moment to indulge yourself. Rather than having the bowl of ice cream and peaches and then go to bed.

Rosie (04:51)
I needed the energy.

going to sleep.

True, why do we do that? That's yeah I'd never thought of it that way. Hmm I do like dessert. Dessert's yummy. I like it. So the fact that it's not really an exciting thing for you hmm hmm

Roula (05:19)
The other exciting thing for me is that if I have not ordered dessert, and mostly I won't, at a restaurant, I like to go for a walk after dinner whenever I'm out at a restaurant. And in this walk, I might get some chocolate, something sweet, little piece of something sweet to eat, ⁓ and then walk to the car, to the station, wherever I'm doing.

Rosie (05:32)
Yeah.

Roula (05:47)
That I feel like I'm enjoying it. To sit and have this after dinner, that's exhausting, boring.

Rosie (05:50)
Okay.

Wow, wow, I'm really, I don't know what to say to your tag,

Roula (06:05)
I I didn't know I think of

this way about dessert until now. Never been in a conversation.

Rosie (06:10)
Hmm.

Yeah, now I really want something sweet though, now that we're talking about it.

Roula (06:19)
Yeah. So yes, the only thing if my child want to say before dinner, go for it. It has to be a reasonable time. So we still finish his dinner. Yeah. Did I? Yeah, I hope I answered your question.

Rosie (06:29)
eats dinner okay okay makes sense. all right interesting.

you did and I learnt something about you. Dessert is not really a thing for you. And if it is, it's probably a little bit of dark chocolate or fruit, something like that.

Roula (06:43)
Also...

Rosie, just remember, I'm 51. What I'm saying now is not something I lived by when I was 20, 30s and 40s. So the way I feel about the sin, I've never had it as a dissent. Like I've never been excited and asked for it, et cetera. But I didn't mind to eat something sweet after dinner because I wasn't in the age where

Rosie (06:56)
⁓ well what did you think about dessert then?

Mmm.

Okay.

Roula (07:15)
I'm more concerned about getting older, healthier, and in a different way. I was active, I'm active now, but it's totally different kind of active, you know? ⁓ So yes, what I'm saying now is at 51.

Rosie (07:21)
Okay.

You are.

Okay, good context.

Roula (07:33)
It doesn't

mean I didn't do it before.

Rosie (07:36)
You know what the moral of or the takeaway of this episode is for me? Dessert before dinner? Why not?

Roula (07:40)
What?

Why not? Especially in the morning.

Rosie (07:45)
Yeah! Love it. I feel like I have permission now.

Roula (07:52)
Yes, yes, enjoy it! Alright, my dear listeners!