The Rosie and Roula Show

101: Just Dance, even if You Can't. You Don't Need Permission to Feel Joy!

• Roula Abou Haidar and Rosie Burrows

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You say you can’t dance? Good. Neither can we. And we’re doing it anyway. 🕺💃 

In this joyful, vulnerable, and slightly ridiculous episode, Rosie opens up about her daily TikTok shimmy challenge—despite claiming she “can’t dance.” Roula dives into why dancing has always been a love language for her, and how it connects us to joy, freedom, and even healing. 

We’re talking about movement as medicine. About letting go. About reclaiming the joy of being silly—without shame. 

This episode covers: 

  • Rosie’s awkward TikTok dancing (and why she’s doing it anyway) 
  • Roula’s favorite place to dance without judgment 
  • How fear and self-consciousness steal our fun 
  • The quiet power of dancing like nobody’s watching—even if they are 

✨ It’s not about dancing well. It’s about dancing at all. Because joy isn’t earned. It’s claimed. 

Whether you dance every weekend or haven’t moved to music in years, this episode is your reminder: you don’t need permission to feel joy. 

🎉 Thank you for 100 episodes! We're giving away exclusive Rosie & Roula merch to celebrate check out rosieandroula.com for your chance to win. 

 

Takeaways 

  • Dancing can significantly improve mood and well-being.  
  • Self-consciousness should not prevent us from enjoying dance.  
  • Everyone has the ability to dance in their own way.  
  • Dancing is about self-expression, not perfection.  
  • Creating a safe space allows for more freedom in dancing.  
  • Dancing with friends enhances the experience and connection. 
  • It's important to let go of judgment when dancing.  
  • Dancing can be a form of connection with others.  
  • The joy of dancing can be found in silly moments.  
  • Dancing is a universal form of expression that transcends skill levels. 

Keywords

dance, self-expression, joy, self-consciousness, connection, safe space, festivals, shimmy, movement, fun


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Rosie (00:01)
Roula You are so small. You are small. You're halfway down the screen. And I'm like barely in the screen. The trouble is my seat doesn't adjust. Yeah, that's better. There you go. I want to talk about dancing.

Roula (00:02)
I feel so small because you're so tall.

better.

dancing yeah tell me what are we gonna talk about how

Rosie (00:21)
Mmm.

This has been on my

mind.

There is a trend on TikTok at the moment called a shimmy day keeps the sad away, which is essentially saying you move your body, your dance, and you're going to feel better. Yeah. And I've been doing it and I've been posting it on the internet, on the Tiki Toki. And you have, yes, you haven't seen them all though. They're quite, quite good. The first one I thought, ⁓

Roula (00:58)
and I've been waiting for them.

Rosie (01:06)
I shouldn't post this like I can't dance. This is embarrassing. And then I went, hang on a minute, Rosie, since when have you been an advocate for not doing things simply because you're worried about people, how people are going to react? And growing up, I rarely danced in public. was very self-conscious because I knew I wasn't a good dancer. And so I wouldn't and I missed out on so much. And so I posted this video of dancing like an absolute idiot.

And I have been doing it every day for probably a week. I think it's been a week and people love it. But more importantly than that, I love it. my goodness. It brings me joy. But is it acceptable for me to be dancing if I can't dance?

Roula (02:03)
You know what?

If we're supposed to be able to do everything like a professional or an experienced person, then we'd rather lock ourselves in our bedrooms.

Rosie (02:17)
True.

Roula (02:19)
You can't dance.

And this means you're not allowed to move your body because I mean you can't dance just sit down. Is this also a correct reaction?

Rosie (02:37)
What, telling someone, yeah.

Roula (02:37)
This even in.

Yeah, this increases how much people are not able to relax and enjoy themselves. This increases our fear what other people are thinking of us.

Rosie (02:46)
Yeah.

Yes. And really, who's to say if I can dance or not? Can people recognize that I'm dancing? Yes. ⁓ rude. No. Well, okay, no, wouldn't, you wouldn't, you wouldn't call me a professional dancer, but you recognize that I was dancing.

Roula (02:57)
debatable, debatable. A professional dancer can say no. No, no, I mean

a professional dancer might say, your dancing is so wrong. Okay, they cannot say you should not be dancing.

Rosie (03:21)
Right, okay, true, yeah. But also, there's just not one way to dance. think, I've heard a few people comment on my videos going, I can't dance, I'm not gonna do that. And I feel like saying, everybody can dance. Whether you're, however it is, you could be paralysed, you can be moving your eyes, or you could be imagining it in your head, or you could be, you know, just in a wheelchair and dancing in different ways. ⁓

It's moving your body. That's what dancing is.

Roula (03:54)
Move in your soul to move your body.

Rosie (03:56)
your soul.

Yes. And I love it. Are you good at dancing? I haven't seen you dance. Not as good as me.

Roula (04:01)
I love dancing.

I'm good. And the first thing,

let me say I'm a different kind of dancer. And when I say I'm good, it's not, it's I can move my body. I can learn the steps. Yeah, I used to dance a lot when I was ⁓ younger.

Rosie (04:16)
Hahaha! ⁓

Mmm.

Roula (04:30)
watch whatever on MTV or top of the pops or something dancing and then just dance along for hours. one thing I find other people who can dance very attractive. That's my turn on.

Rosie (04:47)
Yeah? Yeah, I agree!

Mmm, wow.

Roula (04:52)
And when I saw my husband, actual husband, not my ex, ⁓ dancing, that's what attracted me to him. Not his looks. Well, his looks, of course, but what came first is seeing him dancing. Wow, that's so hot. I love his moves. So dancing means a lot to me and I love to dance and we do go dancing every three months. There's a party here where we live. We go dancing.

Rosie (05:19)
Mm.

Roula (05:22)
And yes, I danced differently than when I was younger. Now I dance different and the music changes. I love to move my body. Do I dance at home? I think I sing more than I dance at home.

⁓ My son dances. I love when he dances and he teaches me his steps. Sometimes he's amazed that I can do it because he has very low faith in me sometimes and moving my body.

Rosie (05:53)
Why do you dance less at home if you love it so much?

Roula (05:59)
I don't know, I'm too busy singing.

Rosie (06:02)
Why don't you sing and dance? That'd be pretty cool.

Roula (06:05)
Yeah,

I haven't tried that. I always find it fascinating singing and dancing. You have to have the right breath. It's an exercise. It's a heavier exercise than only singing and then or only dancing. And yeah, I never tried it. I don't know.

Rosie (06:07)
Mm-hmm.

You need to

try it and report back and send me a video.

Roula (06:29)
I'll do my best. I'll do my best. ⁓ And yes, having fun with my friends would involve dancing. That would be for me the ultimate fun time if dancing is involved.

Rosie (06:30)
You do your best.

Wow. That gives me

anxiety thinking about that. I'm so self-conscious.

Roula (06:48)
⁓ I have an incredible

memory of dancing with my friends here in the Netherlands. But first tell me why does it give you anxiety?

Rosie (06:52)
Mm.

I'm just so self-conscious.

Roula (07:01)
when you're dancing with your friends?

Rosie (07:03)
Yeah, I don't dance with my friends.

I just, couldn't imagine anything worse. Not because I wouldn't enjoy it, but I feel self-conscious. Everyone else can dance, I can't dance. But it's not about anyone else, it? Well, true. But as long as I'm having a good time, does it matter?

Roula (07:16)
You can improve.

I think part of dancing, when you're dancing with a group, it's not making the right moves. It's having this charisma, this contact with others. So even if you feel like, my hands are not following my legs and the music is there and my hands are here, it's how you dance with the other person. Even if it's ridiculous, that makes the difference.

Rosie (07:49)
Yeah.

Roula (07:53)
is the interaction because we're not professional dancers. So when I'm dancing with my friends, we're highly ridiculous and very low dancing skills. We're just being ridiculous and exaggerating and copy. Like if a song come and we know whatever, let's say a song from En Vogue. ⁓ And we remember a video clip and then we try to do it. ⁓

Rosie (07:58)
haha

Hmm

Roula (08:21)
it becomes ridiculous and we exaggerate. Who cares? Who cares? We're having fun. Crazy dancing and connecting. That's part of dancing.

Rosie (08:31)
True,

Connecting. But back to your memory. Enough about that. Enough about me being an awkward dancer and blah, blah, blah. I wanna hear your memory.

Roula (08:37)
If there's a...

Now this, think I said it, I have a group of girlfriends here and even though if we don't see each other for maybe a year, I don't know, we agreed to go to a party and dance. And then something magical happens is that the little persons come out of us and we were again feeling so young, so free, like nothing to worry about.

Rosie (08:48)
that was human. Yeah.

Yes!

Wow.

Roula (09:13)
and include all our ridiculous dance moves. Dancing with strangers, just walking around and being silly. I love it. What I find tough is when everyone is dancing and there's one person standing and watching everyone. That creeps me out. Yeah, I find it creepy.

Rosie (09:17)
Mm.

Mm-hmm. Mm.

Mmm. Grimsmash. What if that's the person

who doesn't feel comfortable to dance?

Roula (09:39)
What are they doing there?

Rosie (09:42)
Good question. Maybe their friends wanted to go there and they didn't feel like they could say no. You are. But it's a good point. What are they doing there if they don't want to? But see, that could be me. I'd be like, I don't want to fucking dance. Well, no, it's not I don't.

Roula (09:46)
I'm being judgmental.

Yeah.

We all understand

there's a reason why they're not dancing, why you're not dancing. But if I'm dancing, I'm making a fool out of myself and you're standing there and watching us. It's like, it's either I will exaggerate just to give you a hard time or I will be so annoyed that you're watching us just do something else.

Rosie (10:05)
And someone's just watching. Yeah, that's creepy.

⁓

So, okay, what would you

do if we went out, Roula? I'm with you and whoever, you group of friends, you take me to this place and I'm feeling really self-conscious, but you know that I'm gonna have a fabulous time if I just let go. How do you deal with someone like me?

Roula (10:34)
Again, please, I was lost a little bit in my thoughts. Can you repeat the question, please?

Rosie (10:41)
you didn't understand because you're old. that what you're saying?

Roula (10:47)
Can you repeat the question, Rosie, before I slap you?

Rosie (10:48)
EEEH

Good luck trying. If we were to go out, Roula, so I'm with you and your friends when you're going to this party. And you know I'm really self-conscious and I don't really feel comfortable to dance, but you know I'm going to have a fabulous time if I just let go and join in. How do you deal with someone like me? What are you going to do?

Roula (11:12)
I'll tell everyone to tease you and dance around you. Yeah, with dancing. Yeah, I cannot tell you how it's just gonna happen. I would not let you stand there and watch. On the other hand,

Rosie (11:14)
⁓ Tease me how? That sounds mean!

Because teasing to me sounds like you're

being mean or you being playful. Playful, okay, all right.

Roula (11:33)
Playful, playful.

Also, if you don't like dancing, wouldn't think I'll put you into this position. Yeah, I'll take you somewhere you like. I want to say something about this place we dance and why we feel so free. My friends and I, we don't go to any place to dance. We go to this lesbian bar to dance. Because...

Rosie (11:40)
invite me. True.

Yeah.

Roula (12:01)
We want to feel free dancing and we don't want anyone to think we're seducing them. We don't want anyone to come and dance with us. That is not anyone. I mean, a male. We don't want males to think we're there to get their attention or to dance with them or ⁓ no, we don't want that. The only place we go dancing when we're a group of girls, we go to this lesbian place because we feel safe. We enjoy it. Even we flirt and we do crazy things, but we know.

Rosie (12:13)
Right.

Roula (12:32)
Everyone is having a great time and no one is trying. I mean, even if they are, it's a different feeling exactly. And this bar closed, unfortunately. So we lost our spot to go dancing. Yes.

Rosie (12:34)
Yeah. You're not worried about the male gaze. Yeah. Right. Yeah.

Aww. Aww. Aww. That's sad.

Roula (12:51)
It's great. Even though I love festivals, dancing at festivals is also one of my favorite things to do.

Rosie (12:58)
⁓ wow. Yeah.

Roula (13:00)
Festivals

have a different vibe than parties or discotheques, yeah.

Rosie (13:03)
yeah, yeah, yeah,

this is true. Go and dance everybody. Go shake your sillies out. Go shimmy, go do something. I don't care if you say you can't dance. Just do it for yourself. Just dance, gonna be okay. What's that song? The Lady Gaga song. does it, okay, anyway.

Roula (13:17)
Just dance. Yes. Yes.

I don't know.

How can you hear the song and not dance?

Rosie (13:30)
true. Yeah, I do move. I do. Yes. Yeah. Okay. Go dance everybody.

Roula (13:32)
True? So play the song and dance! Yes!

Alright,

go dads, bye!